#FBF: The Best Terrible Idea I’ve Ever Heard

Happy #FBF! Here’s an oldie-but-goodie post from Jim: The Best Terrible Idea I’ve Ever Heard. [Editor’s Note: This post is from 2009.]

Jose Freese, drummer for Nine Inch Nails, has come up with an extremely creative way to promote his new album (via Lefsetz) by bundling interesting premiums with purchase.

Heard that a million times, you say? As stale as the cupcake craze, you say?

Well, how’s this for a premium?

For just $75,000, not only will you get a signed copy of the CD, Josh will also make a five song EP about you and your life. AND he’ll take shrooms with you and play Ouija board. AND he’ll join your band for a month, or be your personal assistant. AND he’ll give you a flying trapeze lesson.

And a T-shirt.

Now $75K is a lot of money, so if you’re a little more careful with your music budget nowadays, for just $250, you get the album AND lunch with Josh at either PF Chang’s or Cheesecake Factory. That’s if the person who he’s the personal assistant for gives him the time off, naturally.

Probably my favorite available perk, though, is this:

“Get drunk and cut each other’s hair in the parking lot of the Long Beach courthouse.”

That’s just part of the $1,000 package, and I should warn you that only 10 of those are available.

Seriously (sorta), this is not a bad idea. Obviously, Josh is a funny guy, and it’s possible he’s completely out of his mind. I don’t know.

But I do know that if someone were a true NiN fan, this would be attractive. Sure, only a rich weirdo would buy the $75,000 package, but if we knew how much of the world’s economy turns on the whims of rich weirdos, we’d all probably move to Alaska and buy assault rifles.

I added it all up, and if Josh sells everything on the list, it’s just over $150,000, before any “regular” sales of his record, which, of course, will probably be small-ish, given the state of such things.

On the other hand, this whole thing ought to do wonders for his tour sales.

And, finally, you would be doing yourself a great injustice if you didn’t read the whole thing.

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